Fanfic: How to burn a Waterfall by SonnenFlower (Free to read, 564,411Clicks)

Description:

Fighting in a war is hard. Knowing your whole family is at danger and losing the one person you thought would be there forever is even harder

Characters:

No Archive Warnings ApplyGeorge Weasley/Blaise ZabiniGeorge Weasley Blaise Zabini Lee JordanWaterfall Connection Mental Health Issues Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms Unhealthy Relationships Grief/Mourning no coping at all Heartbreaking Hurt Maybe comfort Drinking to Cope Excessive Drinking Post-War Other Additional Tags to Be Added Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism Dubious Consent Drunk Consent is Not Consent Black Out Self-Destruction Mild Suicidal Thoughts self-destructive behaviour

Summary:

Summary:

Fighting in a war is hard. Knowing your whole family is at danger and losing the one person you thought would be there forever is even harder…but living after all of that might be the hardest of it all.

Notes:

This collection was a stupid idea in on of Hermione’s Nooks chats at first. Then it turned in this amazing project with all the other authors. We have created a whole universe in the background so stay tuned and read the other stories of this collection. They are all intertwined in one way or another and written by amazings authors. It is a pleasure to work with all of you. A special thanks to our amazing Beta KoraKunkel.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Prolog

Chapter Text
What was he even doing here? He looked around. Everything was the same. The same waterfall, the same pond, the same stone they had spent so many hours on, bathing in the sun when not swimming in the pool. Even the fucking birds were probably the same. Singing, jumping around, like nothing had changed.  Why was he here again? Right. Lee wanted to dump his half of Fred into the pond. Like flushing him away in a pretty, natural toilet. Just dump it in, and he’s gone forever.  But only half of him would be gone. The other half was securely stored in the pendant of his necklace. George would never understand why Lee got to have half of him. Sure, he was his fiancé, but wasn’t he himself his soulmate? Didn’t a twin count more?  He wasn’t sure, which was strange, usually he was.. Ah well, surely nothing a sip of firewhiskey couldn’t cure. He liked this bottle. It looked so pretty in the flimsy light of the forest and those glittering stones – ‘George, what the hell? Don’t fall over,’ George watched as Lee stood and walked over to him, his hand outstretched. ‘And give me that bottle, I think you’ve had enough. I brought champagne, for later. But let’s just do this first.’ ‘Yeah, why not flush my brother down the toilet of nature like the shit you give about him?’ ‘Sit, George.’ ‘Just flush him! Go on!’ A fiery rage was suddenly burning inside of him, he just couldn’t tell whether it was his anger or the firewhiskey.  ‘For fucks sake, George. You know as well as I do, that this was his wish! We talked about this, all three of us. I know you prefer to drown yourself in self-pity, but I’ll do whatever it takes to honour his memory. And stop acting like I’m fucking pleased about throwing his ashes here. He asked me to because it means something to him. It means something to us.’ Lee let out a sigh, rubbing his face roughly. ‘Just sit down so we can do this together.’ ‘No.’ ‘I want to honour his wishes. I want to honour his memory’ ‘Blah, blah, blah. As if you had known him only half as good as I did.’ George watched as Lee closed his eyes, obviously trying to quell his anger. Well, George didn’t want him to do that. He was angry and hell if Lee could say he was the better man in the end. ‘He didn’t wanna die, so fuck this honor bullshit. You weren’t even there when he died! You left him! You left him to die by himself! So who are you to talk about honoring him?’ Georges world was spinning. It was spinning much too fast, spiralling around him and he was falling. He was falling again with no hope of ever reaching the ground. Just falling and spiralling and spiralling and falling while the world kept on turning around him as if nothing had ever happened.  Until a pair of blue eyes broke through the whirlwind of colors around him. Not exactly the blue of HIS eyes but blue nevertheless. It was soothing, the eyes helped anchor him. They brought him back to where he had left his body. They were like his personal rock in a roaring sea trying to drown him. These eyes held so much sorrow, so much pain, but also a strength George could only dream of. And this strength was pulling him closer. Closer to those eyes, closer to this rock. Maybe he could hold on to it. Maybe he could borrow some of their strength. His arms worked without his input, holding on to this source of calm and this strength still pulling him closer. Closer till his mouth met another, closer till his hands grabbed an arse, closer till he could burrow himself in it. He’d never need to feel so powerless again if he could just hold on to his newfound rock in the roaring sea. But he was pushed and suddenly he could see clearly how Lee tried to push him away. He closed his eyes, holding on to his illusion of strength, the last solid thing in a spiralling world.“Please, I know you want it as well! I can be everything you want me to. You could call me Fred if you want, I wouldn’t mind. Come on,” He could feel Lee begin to shake in his tight grasp. “You want to as well.” “Get your fucking hands off me,” Lee hissed, but he didn’t try to get away. Sure, Fred had been George’s soulmate, but for Fred, it had always been him and Lee on different levels. Lee would always hold a part of Fred, but George had always been one with Fred and, now that he was gone, George was left feeling half-complete. The other half was gone – forever. But if Lee was part of Fred as well, maybe he could be a small bit of what was missing. So he leaned in again, hoping to find a bit of himself in those eyes. “I said, hands off .” A sharp slap to his face brought George out of his musing. “What the fuck!” Lees voice was shrill. “But you kissed me back!” The ‘I can’t handle being alone anymore’ was left unsaid. “GET AWAY FROM ME!”  Lees screaming felt worse than the slap. George couldn’t move anymore, couldn’t breathe. He looked at his hands. How would one feel when the other was missing? Lost to a world where there should be two but were no longer. “I want you to listen. I want you to shut up, and not move and listen to what I’m saying. Do I make myself clear?” George shied away a bit from the sharp voice but stayed apart from that where he was, not saying a word. “I asked you to come because I didn’t want to do this alone and because I knew. I know that if it was you we were throwing in, Fred would have asked me to come. So, I asked you, and you show up drunk. Which I don’t really mind, but now it’s just adding salt to the wound. Sure, I brought champagne, but fuck George! He’s around your fucking neck!” How did he even know? He hadn’t told anyone about his pendant. Sure, he spoke to it, but only when he was alone. So there was no possible way Lee could know. “I –” “I’m not finished,” Lee was standing now, one hand clenched into a fist, the other held up. George didn’t even try to say something anymore. What for? “I brought weed to talk, so we could relax. So, we didn’t have to think as much to talk about my fiancé . Fuck. Fuck . I know you’re struggling George, but fuck . I’m struggling too, and I asked you so I wouldn’t be alone. I asked you because you’re my friend, and his brother.” The world was spinning again. Why was Lee even shouting at him?  “But we’re the same,” George’s voice was only a whisper to the wind and, if someone had bothered to ask, he wouldn’t have even been able to say who he had meant with that statement. Himself and his dead twin brother, or the grieving fiancé that was standing before him, visibly trying not to slap him again.  “You’re nowhere near the same.” Lees voice had become even sharper, spitting the words to George’s feet. Suddenly, George felt alive. Anger welled up in his throat. It was the first feeling, besides grief and heart-wrenching loneliness, he had felt since he last heard his other half laugh in the halls of Hogwarts. “How would you even know that? Till I lost my ear no one could distinguish us, not even you.” He was bathing in this new feeling. Surrounding himself with it. “That’s a fucking lie and you know it.” Lees hissing made his anger boil even hotter, newer – more alive. “Never once –” And then there was silence. Lee had cut off his words and George felt the numbness of his loneliness creep back to get him. “And…and because Fred would never try to fuck his dead brothers’ fiancé.” Another sentence like a slap. But George didn’t feel it anymore.  “Either you leave, or I leave.” Lees words sound numb to him, like they reached him through a tick curtin.  Not being able to move again, the only thing he could do was lift his head and look his best friend in the eyes – his brothers’ fiancé. “Goodbye, George.” With a crack, he was all alone again and the numbness finally won over.

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