Fanfic: We’ll Always Have AOL by sofyachy (Read for Free, 1,332,114 Clicks)

Description: It¡¯s Christmas 1999, Hogwarts has reopened after a year of renovation, and the eighth-year students are in a mandatory Muggle Studies course that forces them to learn how to use the internet and send email. Draco is struggling, for multiple reasons. This is a tale about the perils of the Send button, among other things (like holiday joy). Happy Effing Christmas.

Characters: No Archive Warnings ApplyDraco Malfoy/Harry PotterHolidays Epistolary AOL Y2K Humor Fluff Fluff and Humor Pre-Slash Early days of the internet Christmas 25 Days of Harry and Draco

Summary: Summary:

It¡¯s Christmas 1999, Hogwarts has reopened after a year of renovation, and the eighth-year students are in a mandatory Muggle Studies course that forces them to learn how to use the internet and send email. Draco is struggling, for multiple reasons. This is a tale about the perils of the Send button, among other things (like holiday joy). Happy Effing Christmas.

Notes: Notes:

This will be a mostly epistolary fic with some scenes happening outside of email. Many thanks to sassy_cissa, celila, and timothysboxers for putting together this Advent challenge! This will be my first foray into the genre, so I hope to do it justice in spite of my snarky sense of humor.Prompt: Lantern in the Window,Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.),Notes:

Draco is lucky he was paying attention when they explained the Backspace key.

Chapter 1: December 1

Chapter Text
From: dracolmalfoy @aol.com ?
To: [email protected] ?
Time: 5:51 PM December 1, 1999
Subject: hello potterpotter,?i understand this may come as a surprise to you to see an email coming from me. rest assured, i would not have chosen to bother you for the sake of this mandatory muggle studies assignment.?however, i must confess that there is much i have yet to learn regarding the way muggles send their messages. I keep trying to hit the right buttons in the address field for someone else, but every time i try to use the spiral a symbol, i only get 2. your address is the only one that this computer volunteered without requiring me to type it, so here i am.?do you know how to get upper case letters. or a question mark. i can only get periods and commas to work. i think this computer is defective.?i look forward to your response, should you wish to send it.draco malfoyp.s. it took me over an hour to type this message. i cannot imagine how long it must take a muggle.?From: [email protected]
To: [email protected] ?
Time: 6:32 PM December 1, 1999
Subject: hello potterpotter,it may surprise you to see a message from me. rest assured, this would not be the case, but apparently yours is the only address that this computer will accept. would you believe that i already sent one such message, but this muggle contraption vanished it without any hint of sending it in your direction. this computer also has a rather poor relationship with capital letters and punctuation. i can only assume that everyone else is equally struggling.should you wish to reply, i look forward to your message.malfoy?p.s. it took me almost an hour to type this second message. muggles must waste entire days sending email.?From: [email protected]
To: [email protected] ?
Time: 6:54 PM December 1, 1999
Subject: a third time is charmingpotter,this is my third attempt to complete our muggle studies assignment and send you an email. the blasted computer keeps vanishing my messages. if you should see this, send help, for i may be trapped for all eternity in this infernal computer room in hogsmeade.malfoy?From: [email protected]
To: [email protected] ?
Time: 7:23 PM December 1, 1999
Subject: WHAT SHOULD I EVEN WRITE HEREpotter,?my attempts to complete our muggle studies assignment have been in vain, for i cANNOT GET THESE MESSAGES TO SEND. THIS IS?APPARENTLY, I CAN ONLY TYPE IN CAPITAL LETTERS NOW. MY FINGER SLIPPED ON A KEY. I COULD NOT GET ANY CAPITAL LETTERS WHEN I NEEDED THEM AND NOW THIS. BUGGERING BLASTEDDO LET ME KNOW IF YOU EVER RECEIVE A MESSAGE FROM ME.MALFOY?From: [email protected]
To: [email protected] ?
Time: 7:34 PM December 1, 1999
Subject: DO YOU REALLY NEED A SUBJECT FRM MEPOTTER,I SWEAR, THIS IS THE WORST ASSIGNMENT IN THE HISTORY OF HOGWARTS. IT MUST BE REVENGE BY THE OWLS FOR THE WAY WIZARDS HAVE USED THEM FOR CENTURIES. NOT BY ME. I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN KIND TO OWLS. BUT I ALONE HAVE BEEN CHOSEN TO PAY FOR THE CRIMES OF HUMANITY.GOODBYEMALFOY?From: [email protected]
To: [email protected] ?
Time: 8:02 PM December 1, 1999
Subject: WHYI AM IN HELL?From: [email protected]
To: [email protected] ?
Time: 8:33 PM December 1, 1999
Subject: All is well now, thank youPotter,Do excuse all but the first message from me. If you can avoid reading them, that would be splendid.?When Professor Montalban returned from dinner, she was able to check that my messages to you did, indeed, send. Also, there is a key called Caps Lock. If you should accidentally type it, as did I, then you can simply type it again to resume using lower case letters. I still cannot use punctuation other than periods or commas, but at least I now have more control over capitalization.I hope you find this information beneficial as you complete your own assignment.In Good Faith,Draco [email protected]@@?Draco cringed as he hit the Send button on the infernal computer. He should be grateful that Professor Montalban even stopped by the computer lab on the outskirts of Hogsmeade. She had noticed the lantern in the window on her way home for the evening, deciding to check in and see who might still be using the lab at such a late hour. He supposed that he should also be grateful that she had chosen to live in Hogsmeade instead of the castle, and that her walk would take her past the lab in the first place.Honestly, he should have asked Professor Montalban how to access the @ symbol while she was here. With her help, he could have sent a message to literally anyone else in the world. Or at least Pansy. Pansy wouldn¡¯t tease him for his lack of savvy with the computer, as Potter was sure to do the next day.?Draco sighed. It was too late for regrets now; he would simply have to live with the fallout from his failures. Again.After remembering to log off the computer, he Noxxed the lantern in the window and made his way down the street to the little flat that he shared with the other Slytherins who had returned for their eighth year at Hogwarts. Maybe he would get lucky and Potter would spare him too much indignity the next day.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.